The first day of my foray into self-discovery hasn’t gotten off to the best start. I spent the bulk of it with my father and sister. That wasn’t the bad part – it was nice to see them. It was more the circumstances that brought us together: deciding on the inscription and a headstone for my mother’s grave. Not the best way to spend a Saturday afternoon. But perhaps it’s appropriate seeing as her sudden death last November was the catalyst that set all of this into motion.
I try to avoid anything that reminds me that she is no longer here, which is rather pointless considering that thinking about her every single day is in itself a reminder. I guess it would be more accurate to say that I avoid situations which deal with her death in a vain attempt to spare myself the pain. Again…pointless. And also patently unfair to my older sister because that means that she is left to bear the burden on her own. It’s enough that she has power of attorney so is in charge of any decisions relating to the estate. I need to put my own selfish emotions aside, step up and do my part – however small it may seem.
We’ve decided to split the Dadwatch duties into six week increments: she’s there now for a weekend of cooking freezer meals and light housework and it will be my turn at the end of July. But although I can bake a mean cake and create other heavenly treats from scratch, my more savoury culinary skills leave much to be desired. Meaning they’re pretty much non-existent.
I’ve got six weeks to train up, so I guess I’m going to have to fit casseroles into the cookie and cupcake-making schedule.
I’ll let you know how it pans out.